Monday, October 6, 2008

MalEnglish

I think I have developed a new hobby recently. I love to look at sign boards, bill boards and whatever board with text on it and study the exact meaning of the text. This hobby could change my entire life, from a talk cock consultant to an ahem~ macho teacher and earn more side income by giving tuition after school. And extra bonus, I might get hundreds of fans in the school, you'd know, those young chicks or even underage chicks admire me just like the Japanese drama "Great Teacher Onizuka" 麻辣教师 GTO. Haha!

So what subject I am capable to teach? Let's begin the first class and you will know!



KITCHEN. Follow me read once, k-i-t-c-h-e-n. Louder class, K-I-T-C-H-E-N. Nothing difference, English is kitchen, MalEnglish is also kitchen, so far.

Pls. It's P-l-e-a-s-e. No typo, it's short form or abbreviation. English is Pls, MalEnglish is also Pls, so far.

Ok, pay attention to this. Don's. D-o-n-'-s, Don's. Pronounce Don't with sss, like don'tsss. In English, there is only don't. In MalEnglish, singular is don't and plural is don's. Why? Bear in mind, we are learning MalEnglish. For instance:

Tolong Jangan-jangan masuk.

千千万万不要进来.

Jangan, singular; Jangan-jangan, plural. 千万, singular, 千千万万 plural. It's the emphasis in the sentence. So, Pls Don's Not Enter is actually "Pls Don't-don't Not Enter". Also means, "Please, don't-don't don't-enter". In short, 2 words, Please Enter.

Understood? Faham?

LoL.

Joke aside, the message on the board should be "Kitchen. Please do not enter." This board is in a popular restaurant at Imbi area, Mei Sin Restaurant. In fact, it should not be blamed for such mistake 'cause it's not a tourist spot like Pavilion case that I posted previously, perhaps with structured reporting and review process on the company publication. Mei Sin Restaurant is just a typical Chinese Kopitiam. To me, this is not a shame and I proudly admit my English is just slightly better than average, but I can speak and write fluent Mandarin, Chinese dialects and Bahasa Malaysia. It's no shame if you don't know other language, it's shameful for those "bananas" who don't understand their own mother language like Mandarin or any Chinese dialects, or even refuse to talk in any Chinese languages! Was it so shameful to speak Mandarin? Would people look down on you when you speak Hokkien? Were you upgraded to higher class crony when you refused to speak Cantonese, Hakka, Teo Chew etc etc?

Sigh~ We are getting more and more "bananas", but I still want to be a CinaBeng who speak loudly my own language.